Addiction: From Running to Embracing

Once upon a time, I proudly told friends and family that I was addicted to running. How else could I explain sticking to regimented training schedules and running marathons that involved mountains and freezing weather? Plus, there was no stigma attached to "running addiction".

Years later, after taking a break from marathon training, I denied that I had a different addiction. My addiction had shifted from running to alcohol to relieve stress. I was in total denial until the consequences started happening.

When it became blatantly obvious to me, I was too petrified to admit that I had an addiction to anyone outside of my immediate family, a few close friends, 12-step group, lawyer, psychiatrist and psychologist. As a child of an alcoholic, I knew too well the "stigma" associated.

Now I am ready to just be me; and be honest about it. "Rigorous honesty" and anonymity is prescribed by at least one 12-step program. The part I've struggled with is how can I be rigorously honest and anonymous at the same time? And how can I help anyone outside of that program if I remain anonymous?

The answer is still muddy, but I now know what path to take. I have experience with 12-step groups (AA and Celebrate Recovery), SMART Recovery, Women for Sobriety, rehab/treatment, psychiatrists, psychologists, recovery books and blogs and podcasts and articles. I do volunteer work with/for Navigate Recovery. I love my 25+ year career/job as a civil servant; but now is the time for me to give back even more. I plan to take courses to become a certified Recovery Coach and/or Addiction Counselor. I am grateful for this inspiration and experience to help others who struggle in the future!

Much love!